We all know tattoos are haram. Yes. But, if you really must, here are 9 deeply profound tattoos that will guaranteed tell the world, once you upload onto social media, that you are a thinking and reflective Muslim individual who thinks about both your life and your afterlife.

1. “Let there be no compulsion in religion;

What better way to give yourself the excuse of having committed tattoos unto your body than to show any annoying Muslim brother that Islam never, we repeat, never forces anyone to do or not do anything.

Let there be no compulsion in religion;” The Holy Quran 2: 256 is the “trump-it-all” phrase you will always have by your side. Wait, now, it’s on your side. See!

Suggested location : Across your back from one shoulder to the other. When someone asks you about tattoos, just take off your top and show them that.

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Ah but of course, what better way to remind yourself to pray than the phone number to Allah himself. The direct line to Allah. Free of charge. No need for any bills whatsoever.

Suggested location : On both forearms. So you are constantly reminded to pray at any moment of the day.

3. Kun Fa Ya Kun كُنْ فَيَكُونُ

Allah couldn’t have said it better.

“Be, and it is!”

Mashallah. This was how it all began. This, right here, was the big bang, without which, we won’t be able to thank Allah SWT today for our existence. Imagine if Allah had said something else instead. Imagine how we could have turned out. You must have heard, if Allah had decided to just put Earth an inch closer to the Sun, we’d be roasted by now. So thank Allah for existence, without which, we won’t have existed. Display your appreciation of existence with the quintessential “Kun Fa Ya Kun”

Suggested location:  Mid back

4. If there was no god, then who is Allah?

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This one, will have your atheist mates checkmated and stumped. Too late for them, you would have sowed the seeds of doubt in their hearts.

Suggested location : Across your chest or along your arms.

5. 100% Muslim

Yes, there have been cases of Muslims losing their way and leaving the religion. When you are on the verge of losing your faith for whatever reason, this tattoo etched onto your skin will make sure you think twice before losing your religion and apostatising. Imagine how dumb you’d look in front of your friends if you were an atheist yet, clearly written on your forearm, it says 100% Muslim.

Suggested location : Somewhere easy for people to see, like your right forearm. , recommended to be placed at somewhere prominent like your neck or possibly forehead.

6. Property of Allah Subahana Wa Ta’ala

They say that heaven is at the sole of your husband’s feet. The only better trump for this is to say that you are the property of Allah SWT himself. And that ultimately you belong to Allah and not your husband. Use this only as and when necessary.

Suggested location : Depends on which positions are favourable for the husband

7. Islam is perfect. I am not.

This is the best way to excuse yourself of any sin as a Muslim. The next time an atheist points you out for a wrong deed, tell him this. That our religion is perfect, but you are not. It serves as a reminder that no matter what sins you commit, Islam remains perfect. Islam shouldn’t be judged for your dastard deeds.

Suggested location : Across your chest.


Accompany this with an image of a surveillance camera.

This will prevent you from committing zina or doing the nasty.   If you are tempted to do the nasty or about to get lucky with a chick, you will be reminded of Allah’s omnipresence. Indeed, there is nothing Allah doesn’t see, and Allah doesn’t like seeing you do the nasty.

Suggested location : Upside down right above your crotch. SO when you look down, and you are able to read it.

9. All 99 names of Allah.

Allah is the only one in this world with 99 names. Not 100 and most certainly not 98. 99 names. Showcase this to any white chick at the bar. Remove your top at the slightest excuse and you’ll have them white chicks swooning over you. If that fails, it’s always a good way to improve your vocabulary anyway. 

Suggested location : All across your entire back. From top to bottom.

Do not forget to share your tattoos on social media. Remember, they don’t exist unless they’re up on social media.

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